Saturday, December 7, 2013

Are you forgiving?

Every so often a human being emerges that shows us what humanity is capable of.  Nelson Mandela was one of those. 

Such a great man, such a great leader can tip us back into buying into the “Great Man” theory of leadership made popular in the 19th century.  The likes of historian Thomas Carlyle believed that the capacity of leadership is inherent, that leaders are born not made.  Effective leaders were seen as those gifted with divine inspiration and who due to their particular characteristics of charisma, intelligence, wisdom and political savvy, were the ones able to have a decisive historical impact.

The flaw in sticking with this theory, is that it fails to account for context, change and all human potential.  We can end up putting such great people on a pedestal or mindlessly worshipping them and in doing so detach our own being from the gifts they share and the possibility that they have entered our life, our consciousness to offer us different ways of relating to ourselves, to others and the world.

We can admire Mandela’s attitudes, actions and achievements.  But for our admiration to mean anything, surely we must dig deep to access those qualities we admire in him in ourselves or to work on developing them further.

One of those wonderful qualities of Mandela’s was forgiveness. Forever the freedom fighter, with insight and feistiness he said "forgiveness liberates the soul. That's why it's such a powerful weapon.".  As in this clip, he was consistent in saying “let bygones be bygones”. 

Have we ourselves been similarly consistent in demonstrating our forgiveness? Are we doing it now?

Our family, friends, partners, colleagues, clients, customers, acquaintances, strangers – are we forgiving of them?  Are we forgiving of those who intentionally or unintentionally, consciously or unconsciously harm us in some way? Are we forgiving of those who just don’t respond or behave in the way we would like?

The word for-give, as in Italian ‘perdonare’ (for donation) is our opportunity to gift, to donate to ourselves and to others, space, grace, healing and the opportunity to move forward.
Who will you forgive right now?



Image:  Nelson Mandela photographed here by Yousuf Karsh (American-Canadian portrait photographer, 1908-2002) as posted by Vivid Greeting Cards on Facebook 6 December 2013.    Vivid Greeting Cards – celebrating the world's wonders with gems found in cyberspace and Gallery Windows of VGC art - Sign up to Vivid Greeting Cards Facebook Page at

Thank you to my parents and Lions Club International for gifting me the opportunity to experience South Africa. Thank you Madiba, with all what you gave to the world you will indeed rest in peace.   Here's to a healing Africa and the world. Gareth will keep the South African stories alive with Taika.

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